Proszę o sprawdzenie opowiadania :)

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
The most exciting holiday of my life!


It was one year ago in July. The weather was excellent. It was very sunny and warm. I woke up and went to kitchen. Fast breakfast and I with my friends started a holiday.
My parents drove us to the airport. We had a flight on 14.00 to London. Mum and dad were very busy so they left us and went to their job. We were a bit scared but really excited too. Suddenly while we were in a toilet someone stole our bags. Fortunately in this suitcases was only food, but we was really angry. We went to security guard but he could not did something. We were sad but flight was waiting for us. We went to a plane and the flight was starting. We forgot about accident and enjoyed holidays.
Our trip was great! We met new people and now we have new friends. The weather was really great and nobody remember about bad accident. We came back happy to home.
It was one year ago in July. The weather was excellent. It was very sunny and warm. I woke up and went to {the} kitchen. {A quick} breakfast and {} my friends {and I} started a holiday.
My parents drove us to the airport. We had a flight {at} 14{} to London. Mum and dad were very busy so they left us and went to their {jobs} (job - jezeli pracuja razem; jobs - oddzielnie). We were a bit scared but really excited too. {At some point,} while we were in {the} toilet{,} someone stole our bags. Fortunately{,} {there} was only food {in the suitcases}, but we {were}really angry. We went to {see a} security guard{,} but he could not {do anything}. We were sad {and our} flight was waiting for us. {Finally,} we {boarded the} plane and the flight {began}. We forgot about {the incident} and enjoyed {our} holidays.
Our trip was great! We met new people and now we have new friends. The weather was really great and nobody {was thinking} about {the disturbance at the airport}. We came back {home} happy.
Dziękują bardzo! A możesz mi powiedzieć, co sądzisz o ty opowiadaniu? Jak na 1 kl liceum na podstawowym kursie? Jak byś to ocenił/a?
przed poprawieniem twojej pracy, dalbym czworeczke

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