rozprawka

To moja pierwsza w życiu rozprawka pisana po angielsku i ogólnie mam nadzieje, że dobrze się do tego zabrałam. Przygotowuje się sama do matury, więc za bardzo nie ma kto mi sprawdzać prac, więc będę bardzo wdzięczna za pomoc. :)

More and more young people are deciding study two subjects at the same time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this decision? This is what I will discuss below.
The main benefit is that, after study two subjects, the young people have more opportunities to find good job. Employers want more people, who graduated two subjects and have greater abilities. Secondly, they learn how absorb the time. Also in the future this will be really useful. Thirdly the most people decides study at the same time similar subjects. It is easier for them, because often, they can take part in some lectures for two field of study.
On the other hand this can be really difficult. They have to spend a lot of time learning. Young people can be bored constantly learn. Moreover they don’t have a lot of time to social life and relax. Is really important have a some free time to rest, have some entertainments and stop thinking about school, but sometimes they can’t have it. Finally you can’t have a lot of time to holiday and travel. Is difficult pass all subjects in first term, so a lot of people have to learn also in holiday.
In conclusion, study two subjects at the same time have more benefits as drawbacks. Taking into consideration all the aforementioned arguments, I think it is worthwhile If you can use this time right.

More and more young people are deciding (cos tu brak) study two subjects at the same time.
The main benefit is that, after studING two subjects, the young people have more opportunities to find (cos tu brak) good job. Employers want more people, who HAVE graduated IN two subjects and have greater abilities. Secondly, 'they' (tutaj nie wiadomo do kogo to sie odnosi) learn how (cos brak) 'absorb' (zle slowo) the time. Also in the future 'this' (zle co dokladnie) will be really useful. Thirdly 'the' (niepotr) most people 'decides' (people to l. mn-decide) (cos brak) study (napisz to 'similar subjects' tutaj) at the same time. similar subjects. It is easier for them, because often, they can take part in some lectures 'for' (ja tu widze 'OF') two field of study.
Young people can be bored FROM constantly 'learn' (napisz 'studying'). Moreover they don’t have a lot of time 'to' FOR social life and relaxATION. Is really important (cos brak) have 'a' (niepotr) some free time to rest, 'have' (nie za bardzo trafne slowo ' napisz 'enjoy') some entertainments and stop thinking about 'school' (nie, bo to jest Uni), but sometimes they can’t have it ALL. Finally you can’t have a lot of time 'to' FOR holiday and travelING. Is difficult (cos brak) pass all cos brak) subjects in first term, so a lot of people have to 'learn' STUDY 'also in' (lepiej 'during their) holidayS.
In conclusion, (cos tu brak) study (cos brak) two subjects at the same time 'have' HAS (the study has) 'more' (zle, tutaj 'as many') benefits as drawbacks. Taking into consideration all the aforementioned arguments, I think it is worthwhile 'If' (if) you can use this time 'right' (cos nie za bardzo trafne slowo).

Masz problemy z przedimkami (a, an, the) Musisz to ogarnac.

Nie powinno byc tu np two majors zamiast two subjects, czy to moze jedno i to samo w BrE?

Terri dzięki wielkie za pomoc! Teraz wiem na czym muszę się skupić. Kolejna praca będzie lepsza. :) Tutaj wstawiam poprawioną rozprawkę według Twoich wskazówek, mam nadzieje, że poprawnie.
Fui_eu mi się wydaje, że to jedno i to samo.

More and more young people are deciding to study two subjects at the same time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this decision? This is what I will discuss below.
The main benefit is that, after studying two subjects, the young people have more opportunities to find a good job. Employers want more people, who have graduated in two subjects and have greater abilities. Secondly, these student learn how to manage the time. Also in the future this skill will be really useful. Thirdly the most people decide to study similar subjects at the same time. It is easier for them, because often, they can take part in some lectures of two field of study.
On the other hand this can be really difficult. They have to spend a lot of time learning. Young people can be bored from constantly studying. Moreover they don’t have a lot of time for social life and relaxation. Is really important to have some free time to rest, enjoy some entertainments and stop thinking about University, but sometimes they can’t have it all. Finally you can’t have a lot of time for holiday and traveling. Is difficult to pass all a subjects in first term, so a lot of people have to study also during their holidays.
In conclusion, to study a two subjects at the same time has as many benefits as drawbacks. Taking into consideration all the aforementioned arguments, I think it is worthwhile if you can use this time good.

Subject to przedmioty np: PE i MATHS. Przynajmniej w moich slownikach tak jest podane. Mnie sie wydaje ze nie o to biega w twojej pracy, ale mozliwe ze sie myle.

Subjects to przedmioty, ale również kierunki studiów. W każdym razie tak mi się wydaje, ale ręki nie dam sobie uciąć.

Secondly, these 'student' (l. mn) learn how to manage theIR time. 'Also' (nie dawalabym tego 'also', zacznij zdanie z In..) in the future this skill will be really useful. Thirdly 'the' (niepotr) most people decide to study similar subjects at the same time. It is easier for them, because often, they can take part in some lectures of two fieldS of study.
IT is really important to have some free time to rest, enjoy some entertainments and stop thinking about University, but sometimes they can’t have it all.
IT is difficult to pass all 'a' (niepotr) subjects in first term, so a lot of people ALSO have to study 'also' (nie w tym miejscu) during their holidays.
In conclusion, to study 'a' (co to 'a' tutaj robi? chce sie wpychac tak od siebie?) two subjects at the same time has as many benefits as drawbacks. Taking into consideration all the aforementioned arguments, I think it is worthwhile if you can use this time 'good' (zla czesc mowy, napisz tutaj 'efficiently').

Lepiej, ale pamietaj o tych przedimkach (a, an, the)

Ok, jeszcze raz dzięki wielkie !
No niestety te przedimki to mój koszmar, ale będę nad tym pracowała.

Which ALL? There are only 2. Do you see my point?

tak, masz racje, tutaj powinno byc...It is difficult to pass the necessary subjects in THE first term....
...to pass these subjects in the first term... jakos tak.

Wciaz nie o to mi chodzi ale juz daje spokój.