Sprawdzenie rozprawki matura rozszerzona

Dzień dobry, proszę o sprawdzenie rozprawki na poziomie matury rozszerzonej.
Z góry dziękuję i pozdrawiam :)





Europe should close its borders to mass imigration

Recently, arrival of imigrants to Europe is a very controversial topic. The cause of these disscusions are terrorist attacs, which had a place in many European countries. People belive that terrorists came to our territory on the pretext of beeing refugees. Europeans live in fear and because of that, reflections on advantages and desadvantages of closing borders to mass imigration are of daily occurrence.
Supporters of prohibition crossing our borders by imigrants are mostly people who feel threat of them. They think that these people are dangerous and they want to bring in chaos to our lives. Putting aside attacs of terrorits, there are other negative results. Imigrants could contribute to increase of crimes or unemployment. It is also hard to provide them accomodation or access to education.
On the other hand, people know that imigrants are in need. They are people who are looking for a safe place for them and their families. They try to get rid of suffering. From an ethical point of view Europeans can’t just ignorate them. It is also important to mention that history has a big influence over people thinking. In past, families of many people were forced to leave their hometown because of war. People start to indentify with refugees and intent to help them.
Taking everything into consideration, intention of closing borders is justified, but not completly. In my opinion, we should remeber that imigrants are people like us. We can’t follow by stereotypes and we should try to help them.

Recently, (brak przedimka) arrival of imigrants to Europe is a very controversial topic. The cause of these disscusions are terrorist 'attacs' (ortog), which had (dodaj tu slowo 'taken') 'a' (niepotrzebne slowo) place in many European countries. People 'belive' (ortog) that terrorists came to our territory on the pretext of beeing refugees. Europeans live in fear and because of that, reflections on advantages and 'desadvantages' (ortog) of closing borders to mass imigration are of daily occurrence.
Supporters of 'prohibition crossing our borders' (to jest za bardzo po polsku, calkowicie tego nie rozumiem) by imigrants are mostly people who feel threatENED of them.
Putting aside (przedimek) 'attacs' (ortog) of 'terrorits' (ortog), there are other negative results. Imigrants could contribute to (przedimek) increase of crimes or unemployment. It is also hard to provide them (brak slowa) accomodation or access to education.
They are people who are looking for a safe place for themSELVES and their families.
From an ethical point of view Europeans can’t just 'ignorate' (ortog) them. It is also important to mention that history has a 'big' (staraj sie nigdy nie uzywac tego slowa, tutaj np. 'great') influence over people'S thinking. In past, (przedimek) families of many people were forced to leave their 'hometown' (nie, lepsze slowo homelands) because of war. People start to 'indentify' (ortog) with refugees and intent to help them.
Taking everything into consideration, (brak przedimka) intention of closing borders is justified, but not completly. In my opinion, we should 'remeber' (ortog) that imigrants are people like us. We can’t 'follow' (nie za bardzo, moze 'be ruled') by stereotypes and we should try to help them.

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