proszę o sprawdzenie i poprawe błędów

proszę o sprawdzenie i poprawienie błędów mojego formalnego listu (reklamacji)oraz jeżeli ktoś może to o przetłumaczenie wyrażenia w nawiasie z góry wielkie dzieki :)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to complain about a thirty pen that can “read your mind” which I bought from your company two weeks ago.
When I received a parcel from you it turned out that I get only fifteen pen and only five of them are working. I am afraid that defective pen did not work property from the start and I am not blame for what happened. I make contact with one of yours dealers in my town but they (spławili mnie ) so I would also like to complain about yours employers. His behavior was rather unfriendly and unhelpful.
I am going to send all this pen to you and I demand a full refund.
I hope you will give this matter your immediate attention.

Bledy:

>a thirty pen

30 to liczba mnoga

that I get only
>fifteen pen and only five of them are working.

zly czas - dostales je w przeszlosci
15 to liczba mnoga

>defective pen did not work property from the start and I am not blame
>for what happened.

tu znowu liczba mnoga powinna byc
property czy properly

I am not to blame

I make contact with one of yours dealers in my town
>but they (spławili mnie )

czas przeszly powinien byc

splawili (obojetnie czy po polsku czy po angielsku) to jest slowo, ktore mozesz uzyc w nieformalnej rozmowie z kolega, a nie w oficjalnym liscie.


so I would also like to complain about yours
>employers.

yours employers jest niepoprawne
yours wystepuje samo, bez rzeczownika

employers? ile ich jest?
employer - pracodawca
employee - pracownik

>His behavior was rather unfriendly and unhelpful.

Kogo zachowanie?

>all this pen
liczba zla; to wyrazenie znaczy "wszystkie ten dlugopis"

dziex za poprawę teraz już chyba jest dobrze :)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to complain about a thirty pens that can “read your mind” which I bought from your company two weeks ago.
When I received a parcel from you it turned out that I got only fifteen pens and only five of them are working. I am afraid that defective pen did not work properly from the start and I am not blame for what happened. I made contact with one of your employee in my town but he refuse assistance to me so I would also like to complain about your employee. His behavior was rather unfriendly and unhelpful.
I am going to send all these pen to you and I demand a full refund.
I hope you will give this matter your immediate attention.
Yours faithfully.