Opowiadanie - Proszę o sprawdzenie

witam

taki gosc dał nam poczatek zadania i tego nie można ruszyc

We were driving a quiet country road just as it was beginning to get dark. As we turned a corner...



i trzeba było wstawic słówka : at first, later on, the next morning, afterwards, immendiately, then, suddenly, in the end, so, becouse of this, consequently, surprisingly, unfortunately, to my horror, to my amazent

także te słowka też muszą byc


We were driving a quiet country road just as it was beginning to get dark. As we turned a corner to our amazement we saw a man on the road. There was very cold so we (id est. me and my friend Mark who is policeman) consequently decided that we will give him a lift. We were going back another way as usual from LA where we work. Because of this we were driving that quiet country road. At first when he gets in the car I thought that he is a criminal. To my horror I saw many scares on his face. Unfortunately he sat down beside me.
Later on he was talking about oneself but then he suddenly took something suspicious out of his pocket. Immediately we thought that was a gun and he wanted to kill us. I shouted to Mark “Give me your gun!”. I killed suspicious man without thinking. Afterwards we saw that the man had only a bar of chocolate in his hand. That was shocking. In the end we threw body away and we leaved that place fastest as we can. The next morning in newspapers it was written “Dead body on the road!”. Police don’t know that Mark took participation in assassination up to this day.





z góry więlkie dzięki
pozdrawiam

pomoże ktoś ?

bardzo proszę

We were driving a quiet country road just as it was beginning to get
>dark. As we turned a corner to our amazement we saw a man on the road.
>It was very cold so we (id est. me and my friend Mark who is
>policeman) consequently decided that we would give him a lift. We were
>going back another way as usually from LA where we worked. Because of this
>we were driving that quiet country road. At first when he got in the
>car I thought that he is a criminal. To my horror I saw many scares on
>his face. Unfortunately he sat down next to me.
>Later on he was talking about himeself but then he suddenly took out
>something suspicious from his pocket. Immediately we thought that it
>was a gun and he wanted to kill us. I shouted to Mark “Give me
>your gun!". I killed suspicious man without thinking. Afterwards we
>saw that the man had only a bar of chocolate in his hand. That was
>shocking. In the end we threw body away and we lift that place as
>fast as we can. The next morning in newspapers it was written
>“Dead body was found on the road!". Police didn't know that Mark took
>participation in assassination up to this day.
naniosłam kilka poprawek...kompletnie nie rozumiem ostatniego zdania... wyrzuc je najlepiej:) pozdrawiam

Police didn't know that Mark took
>participation in assassination up to this day.


chodziło mi o to że policja do dzisiaj nie wie, że mark brał współudział w zabójstwie

jak napisac takie zdanie poprawnie ?

The police to this day don't know that Mark took part in this murder. :) powinno być dobrze:)

dzięki wielkie

Tu dalej są błędy.

As we turned a corner to our amazement we saw a man on the
>road.

As we turned a corner, we were surprised to see a man on the road.

>>It was very cold so we (id est. me and my friend Mark who is
>>policeman) consequently decided that we would give him a lift.

so znaczy consequently więc nie ma potrzeby powtarzać

It was very cold so we (that is my friend Mark, who is a policeman, and I) decided to give this man a lift.

We
>were
>>going back another way as usually from LA where we worked. Because
>of this
>>we were driving that quiet country road.

Tego tu nie potrzeba.

At first when he got in
>the
>>car I thought that he is a criminal.

At first, when the man got in our car, I thought he WAS a criminal.


To my horror I saw many
>scares on
>>his face.

SCARS nie scares

>Unfortunately he sat down next to me.

Nielogiczne. Jeśli jest was dwóch w samochodzie, to na trzeciego już nie ma miejsca z przodu więc pasowałoby gdzieś wyjaśnić dlaczego akurat siedzisz z tyłu.

>>Later on he was talking about himeself but then he suddenly took
>out

Later on he started talking about himself, AND then, suddenly, he took out...

I shouted to Mark “Give
>me
>>your gun!". I killed suspicious man without thinking.

....your gun!" and I fired. I killed the suspicious man...

In the end we threw body away and we lift that place as
>>fast as we can.

In the end, we disposed of the body and left that place as fast as we COULD.

The next morning in newspapers it was written
>>“Dead body was found on the road!".

>...taki gosc dał nam poczatek zadania i tego nie można ruszyc
> We were driving 'a quiet country road' ....a ja myslalam, ze jechaliscie samochodem - a nie jakims 'quiet country road?'
tutaj brakuje ...we were driving DOWN a quiet country road

Stop that. You are clueless.
I can drive a country road, I can drive down a countru road, I can drive up a country road.
I know you cannot. That's because you are clueless.

Buncomne-
Obviously, all I can do is bow to your superior knowledge.

Not knowledge, skills! ;)