Proszę o sprawdzenie listu

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
Rozgłośnia radiowa poszukuje kandydatów, którzy poprowadzą serię programów na tematy bliskie młodym ludziom na świecie. Napisz list do redakcji tej stacji, w którym zaproponujesz tematy, którymi mógłbyś się zająć i uzasadnisz dlaczego jesteś dobrym kandydatem(200-250)
Dear Sir/Madam
I am writing in connection with your job offer which I heard on your radio audition. I like listening your radio station which is my favourite, therefore I decided to write to you. I am 35 years old and I graduated Harvard University. I have been working for five years in the school but now I don’t have a job.
I am sure that I am suitable candidate for this position. I have daughter who is 15 years old. When my child has a problem, she comes to me and we talk a lot of time and we try solve problems. Thanks to this I have big experience with problems young people. I would like to share my knowledge and experience with other people to work as person who conduct series about problems young people. For example on the air I can tell about drinking and smoking which are bad influence for teenagers. We can see on the street how young people think that they are adult. I can also discuss about the best places for date, how to deal with stress or to bring up subject about Internet addiction.
Nowadays young people need to know about disparate matters and How you can see I can give advice to them for different subject. Please give me a chance, I care about this work, and I wish to contribute to its development in a broader scope.
I look forward to your prompt reply.
XYZ
Dear Sir/Madam (przecinek)
I am writing in connection with your job offer which I heard on your radio 'audition' (dla mnie to jest zle slowo). I like listening (brak slowa) your radio station which is my favourite, therefore I decided to write to you. I am 35 years old and I graduated (brak slowa) Harvard University. I have been working for five years in 'the' (wg mnie zle slowo) school but now I don’t have a job.
I am sure that I am (brak slowa) suitable candidate for this position. I have (brak slowa) daughter who is 15 years old. When my child has a problem, she comes to me and we talk a lot of (brak slowa) time and we try (brak slowa) solve problems. Thanks to this I have 'big' (calkowicie zle slowo,) experience with problems (brak slowa) young people. I would like to share my knowledge and experience with other people to work as (brak slowa) person who conductS (brak slowa) series about (brak slowa) problems (brak slowa) young people. For example on the air I can tell (ale komu? musisz napisac) about drinking and smoking which are bad influenceS for teenagers. We can see on the street how young people think that they are (brak slowa) adult. I can also discuss about the best places for (brak slowa) date, how to deal with stress or 'to' (niepotr) bring up (brak slowa) subject 'about' (zle slowo) Internet addiction.
Nowadays young people need to know about 'disparate' (ciekawe slowo, ale wg mnie zle) matters and (tu brak pare slowo) How you can see I can give advice to them 'for' (zle slowo) different subjectS.

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