Bardzo proszę o sprawdzenie listu prywatnego

Dear Frank!

Thanks for your recent letter. I'm sorry, that I haven't written for two weeks. I was so busy, because our teachers gave us many difficult homeworks.
I'm really glad, that you sent me photos from our excursion to Oxford. In my opinion the best picture is that where we are standing near the Oxford University and smiling to the British students. Do you remember that situation when we were telling them funny stories? We made it that they convulsed with laughter. (My zrobiliśmy to tak, że oni pękali ze śmiechu.) That was very amusing.
I remind that you forgot to enclose a group photo. This is that picture, where we were sitting on the stairs near the St. Andrew's Church. At the background is a green hedge. We are standing between Joshua and Tom.
Please send me this photo, because my dear aunt wants to see that church and our protectors. She will be angry if I don't get that picture.
I promise you, I will enclose to my next letter photos which was made by me. They are really good quality, so I supposed that you will want them.
I hope that we will go to the excursion together at next year. I suggest that we should go to the Spain. Give Jane my regards - I will be thankful. I miss you so much!
Lots of love,
Wioleta

Przepraszam za usterki. Bardzo proszę o sprawdzenie :)

I'm sorry, that I haven't written for
>two weeks. I was so busy, because our teachers gave us many difficult
>homeworks.

Przed "that" i "because" nie powinno być w tych zdaniach przecinka.

homework jest niepoliczalne - nie ma "a homework" ani "homeworks"

...gave us a lot of difficult homework.

>I'm really glad, that you sent me photos from our excursion to Oxford.
bez , przed that

>In my opinion, the best picture is THE ONE where we are standing near the
>Oxford University and smiling AT the British students.

We made THEM convulse with laughter.

>I remind (nie wiem o co Ci tu chodzi z tym remind - przypominać) that you forgot to enclose (załączyć w liście?) a group photo.

>church and our protectors. (jacy protectors?)

>I promise you THAT I will enclose WITH MY next letter photos THAT WERE TAKEN
>by me.

They are really good quality, so I SUPPOSE that you will want
>them.

>I hope that we will GO ON ANOTHER excursion together next year.

dlaczego wstawiłaś "the" przed Hiszpanią?

Przepraszam za błędy, ale to z pośpiechu, bo miałam dzisiaj do napisania dwa listy.