esej do sprawdzenia.

bardzo proszę o sprawdzenie poniższego eseju. temat to: it is wrong to kill animals for their fur. do you agree?

Every year die about million animals just in Polish. They die, because people kill animals for their fur. Many people think, that this is immoral behaviour and i consider myself to them. It is my own opinion that killing beasts for their fur is barbaric and should not place in the twenty-first century.
First of all putting to death animals reduce variety in nature. A lot of kind of animals are danger of extinction. They have not a chance of survival if people will kill them still. Furthermore, i do not understand people, who wear animal furs and contribute to die a few millions animate beings. It is unnecessary, because instead natural furs, they can wear man-made furs. Man-made materials are cheaper and very similar to original.
Above all it is cruel. Animals, which will be use in the future for their fur are keeping in very cramped cage. Of course this places, where they are keeping not fulfil sanitary conditionds. Their lives is short and unhappy. Many people - id est producers of fur - forget that animals is not things, but like the people feel pain. Society should to reduce their suffering, because animals are creatures living. Unforunately is inversely.
Some people hold, that animal fur is warmer and more attractive than man-made materials. However, in my opinion that is not enough important reason to kill animals.
In conclusion, man-made materials not to replace exactly natural fur, but wearing artificial fur is not so harmful. If people will be kill beasts with this reason, balance in environment will be destroy.

jeśli już nikt mi nie pomoże to trudno, po 23 nie ma się co trudzić, bo esej muszę jutro oddać...

w gruncie do ok 1 w nocy jeszcze skorzystam, jak ktos sprawdzi :)

przed that nie ma przecinka,

to tak na szybko, już jestem wykończony dziś :)

>Every year {} about {a} million animals {die} in {Poland alone}. They die because
>people kill animals for their fur. Many people think that this is
>immoral behaviour and {I} consider myself to {be one of} them. It is my own opinion
>that killing beasts for their fur is barbaric and should not {take} place in
>the twenty-first century.
> First of all, {killing of} animals {reduces} variety in nature. A lot
>of {different kinds} of animals are {in} danger of extinction. They {will not stand} a chance of
>{surviving} if people {still keep killing} them. Furthermore, {I} do not
>understand people who wear animal furs and contribute to {dying of} a few
>{million animal} beings. It is unnecessary because, instead {of} natural
>furs, they can wear man-made furs. Man-made materials are cheaper and
>very similar to {the} original.
>Above all, it is cruel. {The} animals which will be {of} use in the future for
>their fur are {kept} in very cramped {cages}. Of course {such} places
>where they are {kept} {do} not {comply with the} sanitary conditions. Their lives {are}
>short and unhappy. Many people, {such as} the producers of fur, forget that
>animals {are} not things; like {} people, {they} feel. {The} society should
>{} reduce their suffering, because animals are {living} creatures.
>Unforunately, {it} is {otherwise}.
> Some people hold that animal fur is warmer and more attractive than
>man-made materials. However, in my opinion, that is not {an} enough
>important reason {for killing} animals.
> In conclusion, man-made materials {are not} exactly {the same as} natural fur,
>but wearing artificial {furs is not so harmful {to furry animals}. If people {continue killing}
>beasts {for} this reason, {the} balance in {the} environment will be {destroyed}.