Opowiadanie z elementami fantastycznymi

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
Opowiadanie jest pewnie naszpikowane masą durnych błędów, więc tym bardziej dziękuję za choćby pobieżne jego sprawdzenie.

A long time ago, in a small, wooden house, has lived the girl called Madelaine. Her poor, but loving parents, were so proud of her and others has been envying them, because Madelaine was just an example of perfect daughter. Well - bred. Friendly. Always empathic.
Just the good-hearted person.
Life was going on - the sun was coming up everyday, people were getting born and were dying. The girl has still been the same and, since she went to school for the first time, her goodness could be passing to another people. Madelaine quickly found a lot of friends and made herself liked by school mates and teachers.
But there was the one thing, that has been puzzling everyone.
Madelaine was always wearing full-length skirts and dresses and she has been protecting her legs by the visibility. It's semeed that she wanted to obfuscating something, but no one was mentioning about it, because everyody were affraid to offended Madelaine - so she still was so undiscovered even in Summer.
What the mystery it was? Madelaine was shouting everytime, when her parents were taking up this subject. She was crying and running around their small, wooden house. She was pushing herself in the head by the fists. And it was the only exception, when she wasn't polite and calm.
'Sunshine, you may see, that your's legs aren't like anyone's legs and that I preach you to wearing long clothes...', begun mom timidly, when Madelaine was eight years old.
Yes, she did, of corse. She admittedly didn't understood it, but she was trying to think, that everything is in it's place.
'...and I supose, that you should know, who you are', mom was moving on.
It sounded like a sentence with the childish games simulating real life. Children lives in belief, that adults uses big words in their big dialogues. Well, who's the Madelaine? Tell, please. Do you want some coffe? What a beautiful weather, isn't it?
'You're the half-human and half- stork', said her mother very silently. It was stupid. It was illogical. A little bit funny. But Madelaine had no choice. She was it all. Strange and abnormal.
From that incident elapsed two years. It was the first, serious conversation beside her and her mom. Basically it was mom's monologue, though Maddie didn't wanted to tell anything after. She didn't taking pity on herself. She just was often watching her legs - long and red. Inhumane.
Life was still going on. Dad forbidden her to tell anybody about ''Madelaine's truthful character''.
'No one can know about you', he was saying, so everyone was knowing about someone else, then Madelaine.
Father didn't tell his daughter why she is diffrent. Daughter wasn't insisted. But she was the perfect daughter.
When Madelaine has been feeling sad, she was going by the lake at the evenings. It was a beautiful place near to her house, where the grass was green and the sky was clean. Madelaine was loved being there and putting legs to the water.
One time somebody seen the girl and it happened thing, that Madelaine's dad was very affraid of. Somebody has seen her in the ''truthful character'', when she was thinking that it's invisible.
He was watching her for a few, maybe several dozen minutes, hiding behind the tree.
Suddenly, he decided to disclose himself. Now or never.
She was frightened, when she was looking at skinny boy sitting next to her. She wanted to run away, but her legs could be even more autoptical than then.
'Who are you?' asked stranger.
'Madelaine. I'm Madelaine. And you?' her polite person was demanded niceness from her.
'Peter Panic', replied the body and glanced at her legs. Oh, no.
'Nice to meet you' said Madelaine, shaking. Is he able to accepted her? Is he able to understand this?
She was starting to feel, that he was able to. The way he was looked at her...was it understanding? She's going to fall in love with him. He's legs is so other than her, but who cares. I'm not perfect, but he is. Rescue her. She's going to fall apart.
'I was always thinking that saying about children bringing by the storks is nonsens. Evidently not!' Peter moved back and was burst of laughing.
'You're a monster!' he shouted and wanted to hit Madelaine very hard.
But when he barely touched her body in cruel, painful touch, his hand was starting to change in branch. Finally he become the tree in his whole body. Madelaine droped down on his non-existent knees.
When she was fifty, she weaved a nest on Peter's Panic treetop, because he was sufficiently high and big yet. This is the story about the Storkly Madelaine and the Peter Panic Flagpole.
ładna bajka z puenta, tak na 90% powinno to być:
A long time ago in a small and wooden house lived the girl called Madelaine. Her poor, but loving parents, were so proud of her and others had been envying them, because Madelaine was just an example of perfect daughter. Well – bred, friendly and always empathic.
Just the good-hearted person.
Life was going on - the sun was coming up everyday, people were getting born and were dying. The girl had still been the same and, since she went to school for the first time, her goodness could be passing to another people. Madelaine quickly found a lot of friends and made herself liked by school mates and teachers.
But there was the one thing that had been puzzling everyone.
Madelaine was always wearing full-length skirts and dresses and she has been protecting her legs by the visibility. It's seemed that she wanted to obfuscate something, but no one was mentioning about it, because everybody were afraid to offend Madelaine - so she still was so undiscovered even in Summer.
What the mystery it was? Madelaine was shouting everytime, when her parents were taking up this subject. She was crying and running around their small, wooden house. She was pushing herself in the head by the fists. And it was the only exception, when she wasn't polite and calm.
'Sunshine, you may see, that your's legs aren't like anyone's legs and that I preach you to wearing long clothes...', begun mom timidly, when Madelaine was eight years old.
Yes, she did, of course. She admittedly didn't understood it, but she was trying to think, that everything is in it's place.
'...and I suppose that you should know, who you are', mom was moving on.
It sounded like a sentence with the childish games simulating real life. Children had lived in belief that adults used big words in their big dialogues. Well, who's the Madelaine? Tell please. Do you want some coffee? What a beautiful weather, isn't it?
'You're the half-human and half- stork', said her mother very silently. It was stupid. It was illogical and a little bit funny. But Madelaine had no choice because it was she with her full individuality-strange and abnormal.
From that incident elapsed two years. It was the first, serious conversation beside her and her mom. Basically it was mom's monologue, though Maddie didn't wanted to tell anything after. She didn't taking pity on herself. She just was often watching her legs - long and red. Inhumane.
Life was still going on. Dad forbidden her to tell anybody about ''Madelaine's truthful character''.
'No one can know about you', he was saying, so everyone was knowing about someone else, then Madelaine.
Father didn't tell his daughter why she was different. Daughter wasn't insisted. But she was the perfect daughter.
When Madelaine had been feeling sad, she was going by the lake at the evenings. It was a beautiful place near to her house, where the grass was green and the sky was clean. Madelaine was loved being there and putting legs to the water.
One time somebody saw the girl and it happened thing, that Madelaine's dad was very afraid of. Somebody had seen her in the ''truthful character'', when she was thinking that it's invisible.
He was watching her for a few, maybe several dozen minutes, hiding behind the tree.
Suddenly, he decided to disclose himself. Now or never.
She was frightened, when she was looking at skinny boy sitting next to her. She wanted to run away, but her legs could be even more l than then.
'Who are you?' asked stranger.
'Madelaine. I'm Madelaine. And you?' her polite person was demanded niceness from her.
'Peter Panic', replied the body and glanced at her legs. Oh, no.
'Nice to meet you' said Madelaine, shaking. Is he able to accepted her? Is he able to understand this?
She was starting to feel, that he was able to. The way he was looked at her...was it understanding? She was going to fall in love with him. He's legs were so other than her, but who cared about. I'm not perfect, but he is. Rescue her. She's going to fall apart.
'I was always thinking that saying about children bringing by the storks is nonsense. Evidently not!' Peter moved back and was burst of laughing.
'You're a monster!' he shouted and wanted to hit Madelaine very hard.
But when he barely touched her body in cruel, painful touch, his hand was starting to change in branch. Finally he become the tree in his whole body. Madelaine droped down on his non-existent knees.
When she was fifty, she weaved a nest on Peter's Panic treetop, because he was sufficiently high and big yet. This is the story about the Storkly Madelaine and the Peter Panic Flagpole.
Dziękuję, jestem bardzo wdzięczna!:*

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