Scream in the night... 23:07
.... They are drving us... we don't know where.., We have fallen into our thoughts.
Not talking about what waits us. My sole is pure and I'm completly calm.
Maybe my heart would begin to sing if I saw you father, brother and sister, my friend, my all...
Because.. you are everything to me, my light, my life, my future..
Why am I so calm, nothing is bothering me, nor shouting, nor curses, nor hits, nor tears.. nor blood flowing down from my forehead all over my face.. What is wrong with me?
I'm happy you're not in here and you won't experience this what they are doing to me..
I feel cold, and some warmth of pride has got into me, and joy that I'm one of You, who have heart and soul so big, that all evil on this world can't destroy it.
As id I saw you.. trought the window of the bus sieged by people, women and children, waving, yelling, screaming, but I... I don't hear them, I don't want to look trought the window at You, who gave me all this life and all your love..
The bus stopped... I woke up from my ' dream ', looked out the window... Oh NO..
While I was leaving the bus and found myself on this rusty stairs, I felt a blunt hit over my head..
They are hitting me all over my body, it's dark, I see nothing, all I fell is ' relaxating cold '
Why are You attacking me? I don't know who you are, I don't know anyone here.
I entered a big door, big massive door, what was it? A hangar? A grawe?
In one corner.. there were some people, all covered in blood... maybe this is my last home, it passed trought my head.. or... perhaps... a place for my execution...
We are cramming eachother..our looks were saying...' I'm sorry if I done something wrong to you...', because.. we saw our end..
We turned around, put our hand behind our necks and turned towards wall..
SILENCE... as nobody's in here...
and then.. a sound of a whistle..
Blunt hits could be heard..screaming of the savage people, howls and falling of unconscious people..
' Why I am not falling ' ?
I heard a voice... full of hate and anger, no. I'm standing proudly and under the burden of hits of the bat against my back, against my face, against my head...
I feel horrible pain, but pride in me is stronger than pain..
And again...there was another sound of the whistle and all ended...
They left.. howls and cries could be heard...
Looked left.. looked right..under the eye I think I saw a few bodies lying lifeless on the floor... The whistle sounds again...
Hits again.. My bones are cracking... My face crashed into the wall.. My head was bleeding.. I lost my conscience.. all was swinging but I was still on my feet..
I prayed to God not to let me fall down... I felt the warmth of my blood and the hits... everythng bacame silent again...
I cannot move... I am still lying down with my face in my blood..
I'm trying to move..bacause I can't hear, nor see...
My body is aching.. terribly, but finally I manage to turn and sit, wiping the blood of my face and eyes
My heart is shrinking from the sorrow watching how they are cruelly beating a father and his son and both fell on their knees and falling down under the hits with metal pipes...
They were returning in.. taking men out... All who they took out... never returned back in..
I realized I don't have my watch and golden necklass which I got for my 18th B-day... they took all..
Now I'm a stranger... with no name, no adress, no life..
Then I realized... This Is my end, the end of us..
they are taking me out from the building.. hiting me again and pushing into some trailer...
They are driving us..., I know... It's a one way trip...
One of men told me... They are taking us to the shooting... The shivers passed trought my whole body.. IT'S OVER... I was thinking.. I'm all broken... have no strenght..
I wanted to jump out the trailer into bushes.... No.. No.. No... I have no strenght to reach the back end and jump out..
Tears started flowing.. I remember all of you who saw me off saying-- Don't go.. you can die...
It's early morn', the dawn is breaking... The bloody Sun rises behind big masive and large black clouds......Trailer stopped..
They are dragging us out of the trailer...I was falling down each time they lifted me up because... all my bones are broken...
We're forced to move to some elevated place...cuoldn't see nothing because od this light comming from wehicles that are surrounding us..
I was aware, and the others too, it's out last station... our grave...
Forgive me for all I ever done to you untill now not knowing it...
Forgive me if I didn't love you the way I was supossed to..
Forgive me for all bad words, for all pain I caused to you...
Don't cry.. I'm leaving this night... Having my heart and soul full of love for you...
My all... walk proudly... You have reason why to..
My all... I did it...my dream... It comes to an end..
I'm leaving with God's will..
LET IT BE...
Will someone, someday, somewhere found our bones in this wilderness?
My entire life ran in front of my eyes...all sweet memories...and events...
I felt a blunt hit on my chest...A shoot could be heard...Lifting me from the ground...
I am flying...
I am loosing my breath...
I am suffocating...
Everything is shutting down... slowly... and
I'm disappearing....
I'm gone...
( To Larry B. RIP )