Bardzo Prosze o sprawdzenie rozprawki

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Temat: Coraz więcej młodych ludzi decyduję się na równoczesne studiowanie na dwóch kierunkach. Napisz rozprawkę w której przedstawisz argumenty za i przeciw podjęciu takiej decyzji.

Nowadays universiies are giving yuong people a lot of perpectives. They are offering many fileds of study. More and more young people decided studying in two directions at the same time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of taking such a step.
The main benefit, of course is that you can gain extra valuable skills which maybe useful to you in the future. Not only that, but when you star applying for job after graduating, your CV will be richer and more interesting for your future employer
Moreover, you can choose the second directions which is connected with your hobbys. It helps you extend your interest and will give you a lot of fun.
On the other hand studying on two directions in the same time requires so many time. If you choose a hard and difficult directions, you may havent eneugh time for learning. Not to mention about free time for themselves.
In addition, when you choose second direction you have to pay for it. It costs a lot of money. many people couldnt afford for it.
In conclusion, studying at the two directions at the same time has as many benefits as drawback. In my opinion, it is worthwile if the second direction is interesting or relevent to your future career. However it is a matter of personal choice.
They are offering many fileds of study"- użyłabym Present Simple,
"More and more young people decided studying in two directions at the same time" - more and more nie pasuje mi to czasu jaki użyłeś, użyłabym jakiegoś teraźniejszego,
"which maybe useful" - w tym znaczeniu chyba may be,
"Moreover, you can choose the second directions which is connected with your hobbys" popraw podkreślone,
"so many time"
"a hard and difficult directions"
"you may havent eneugh"
"Not to mention about free time for themselves" w poprzednim zdaniu pisałeś 'you'
"couldnt afford for it"
"has as many benefits as drawback" ostatnie słowo winno być w l.mn.
"it is worthwile if the second direction is interesting or relevent to your future career"
aha nie jestem pewna czy "direction" ma w ang. takie znaczenie o jaki ci tu chodzilo
hmm to jak bedzie kierunek studiów w j. ang ? A to podkreślone poprawić tzn ? co tam się nie zgadza?
kierunek = programme, degree programme
enrol in two programmes - zapisuja sie na dwa kierunki
Dziękuję :P
tak podkreślone do poprawy
Temat przeniesiony do archwium.

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