list do gazety

Mam napisać list do redakcji czasopisma w sprawie artykułu o emigrujących młodych ludziach. Mam określić cel listu i podać narodowość. Podać 2 powody dla których ci ludzie emigrują. Opisać 2 skutki tego zjawiska. Ocenić artykuł i zachęcić czytelników do dyskusji.

Dear Editor,
I writing in connection with the article about emigrate young people. I come frome Poland. I intrested in this article beacuse a lot of my friends left my country.
I must say, young people emigrate beacuse they looking for better job. I know many people who have low salary.
I convinced that young people leave country beacuse they get an education and enlarge on knowledge.
In my opinion for this reason in my country is larger unemployment. Another argument to prove it is that in my country is less experts for example doctors.
I must say that the writer is right and the article is very good. I think other readers should write about this issue.
Yours faithfully,
XYZ

Dear Editor,
I writing in connection with the article about THE emigratION OF young people. I come frome (orto) Poland. I AM intrested in this article beacuse a lot of my friends HAVE left my country.
(I must say- nie potrzeb) Young people emigrate (wszyscy? some?) beacuse (orto) they ARE looking for better jobS. I know many people who EARN A low salary.
I'M convinced that young people leave country (kogo country? their? jakie country Poland?) beacuse (orto) they get an education and enlarge (nie pasuje) on knowledge. (they get an education and wish to do what?)
For this reason, (in my opionion) my country is EXPERIENCING larger (higher? greater?)unemployment. Another argument to prove it is that in my country is less experts for example doctors. (What are you trying to "prove"? fewer doctors? fewer specialists? are people emigrating to get access to better health care?)
I AGREE WITH THE writer and THINK the article is very good. I think other readers should write about this issue.
Yours faithfully,
XYZ